Sunday, June 05, 2005

I probably don't know what Tim means by dramatic-monologue-in-advance. I realize there's an if there, so I can misread to my hearts content. I got to thinking of how so MUCH of what I've written in my life was done with no consideration of what it (the writing) was doing. I'm thinking of what I wrote in school, even elementary school: essays, poems, test answers, stories: whatever I was told to write. the diffrence between what I thought I meant, and what the words ended up doing. this is a developmental thing, I know, part of the critter entering the world. at 16 I took the initiative to write what I wanted, even to say poetry. well, I wrote what was present for me to write, big difference: "he wants to say something but is saying it anyhow". gradually I saw that my writing wasn't what I thought. the thing in my head, amorphopus but somehow powerful, was not necessarily what found its way onto the paper. was never so, frankly. so I started rewriting. also considering what the matter of poetry was. that's a hard question, of course. my 10 year old friend Isaac understands his writing as 'art', as some integrative process. he has that consideration when he writes and draws, but he doesn't rewrite. essentially, he doesn't read his work, he still sees on the page what his mind saw in the writing glimpse. wow, I'm writing a confused here, but maybe I'll hit on a glint. my mission, then, is trying to shorten the distance between what I thought (my own writing glimpse) and what makes it to the page (or whatever medium). I'm sure you're trying to do the same. ever since I became aware as a writer that someone on the other end might respond, I assumed a you. readers of my work will see a frequent use of 1st person plural. it doesn't feel like a dialogue, nor solioguy, nor monologue. it feels, to me, however much I delude myself, as an act of sharing. but of course I flub that a lot.

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