Friday, July 03, 2020

Karen vs the Mask (A Pandemic Tale)

I had my first Pandemic Karen moment yesterday. The few previous negative interactions have been more certified asshole vs my angelic nature. Yesterday was a matter of entitlement.

I saw in a glimpse someone enter briskly as I stood at the counter with a customer. My colleague on the floor noticed her masklessness and spoke up. She said masks make her sick and hustled on. He was with a customer and didn’t go beyond that.

When done with my customer I saw the perp just gabbing with someone. It angried up my blood, I will admit. I went to her and told her she had to leave if she won’t wear a mask. She was outraged. Masks make her ill. I didn’t negotiate, I said you must leave. Can I buy this 12-pack of Sam Summer Ale. No, you have to leave. And blah blah blah. Just go!

The person she was with offered to buy the beer. Karen told my colleague and me that breathing co2 makes her sick, and the moisture... What exactly about the moisture? I don’t know. Neither of us wanted to hear it.

A masked Karen could have been in an out with her Sam Summer in three minutes. She seemed a healthy forty years old and could handle the ravages of co2 and moisture. That’s an assumption, I know, but it is not like she cited emphysema as why she refuses masks. I have had two customers who made me think they should go without. They both were older and breathed with effort. They managed.

A man was at the counter with my colleague. He asked if many people go without mask. It has become a rare occasion, he was told, and often enough they go get their mask without reminder.

The guy turned out to be a friend of Karen, came with the other woman. He said in Kentucky, masks are not required. He went on to say he doesn’t believe in wearing masks. He wears them out of respect, or courtesy. He added that he is in the healthcare industry.

Not specifying in what capacity, as doctor, nurse, or technician, leaves one to wonder to what degree he is in the industry. I shrug. Karen speaks of illness but she means discomfort. The words are not synonymous.

Karen entered the store as if it were her right to go unmasked. The answer to that is: 1) The state has issued a mandate. 2) The store can set its own policy. Showing customers that the store takes this shit seriously is an act of reassurance.

Beth went into the hardware store the other day. A kid sat at the register without a mask. Beth pressed him to put one on, and he ignored her. Finally another employee said, just put the mask on, it is making customers uncomfortable. That’s all, just do it for that. Amidst the world’s problems, mask-wearing does not scale.

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